Something about: Because I can do so.

I choose to believe him. Because he's my best friends, and I believe that he'll never once do something that'll hurt me nor my feelings. Let's just pray that he won't, okay? ;) Tonight, we kinda talks a lot. I'm glad that he's still there, by my side, and tell me when I did mistakes. Scold me, even. It makes you happy to know that there's people that actually cares of you. =)

I don't know what's wrong with me right now. It feels like I'm riding a roller coaster or something. Haha. I'm too confused to put my feelings into words right now. XD I need to take a breather, rest, before continue walking in my life.

Anyway~ take care and have a great day, everyone~~~ 

(|]^.^[|)♪♫ - Nat King Cole - LOVE

Something about: about time.

There's people that'll try their best to hurt you.

There's also people that'll their best to protect you.

There's people that'll be sad when you're feeling down.

There's also people that'll smile when you're laughing your hearts out.

I remember a guy had said, "living this life with the same amount of tears and laughter, that what I want to do". For some reason, it broke my heart a little. "Lots and lots of people will chose smiling and laughing and just - be happy, rather than be sad and cry, so why you choose to live your life like that?" - I want to asks him. But I never get the chance to do so. Life is full of hope, right? That's one of the purpose of living, right? I wonder what will he answer me. Though its almost impossible. But who knows if we'll ever meet, no? Life is full of surprises.

I remember how traumatized I was once upon a time. To know that there's people hurts because of me. Because of naivety. Because I was dumb back then. Because I didn't believe that such thing would happen. Because when I know about it, it had already been to late to do something.

If you think that I'll be happy over someone else's sadness and hurt, you're totally wrong! No matter how bad I am, I can't do something like that. Its just so wrong. Its inhuman. And I still am a human, I still have feelings. But then, everything that I do or I say is just futile to you now, right?

Anyway~ take care, and have a great day, everyone~~~

~*~NaBiLaH~*~

(|]-,-[|)~♪♫ Kertas - Penantianku 

Sesuatu tentang: hukum dunia. =)

Tak bermakna yang tak jahat itu baik.

Dan tak bermakna jugak yang tak baik itu jahat.

Nothings ever black and white.

Please bear that in your mind, yeah? =)

I hate when I'm being forced to do something that I refuse to.

Something about: happiness. :)

A few good things had comes to me. I think I'm much more calm right now, compare to few days back. Few hectics days had almost makes me lose myself. Things comes all too sudden at the same time had really, really makes me depressed, actually.

What would you do when trust come into your vision? One of my best friend asks me, did I trust him? There's few things had happen that I think, did affect our relationship a little. It wasn't that I didn't trust him, but right now, under this circumstances fall upon me, I don't know if its something that I could give to him. Trust is a big word, you know? Too big to be talked about right now.

Up until now, I never know how to act, to say, to do, when someone confess to me. Anyhow, thanks to everyone that liking me. I never good at feelings. *blushing* But I just hope that things will never be awkward in the end. Awkwardness is tiring. Suffocating. It makes me can't breath freely, do things as I wish and much more. I hate that.

Losing my "single" status is NOT my top priority right now. I still have a dream that I'm chasing. But if the right time, right person, and Mr Right had come, why not? I'm not running away, but I guess, opening my heart again is going to takes some time. Afraid to be hurt had making me hid into the shell, again. Yes, I'm a coward. But hey, wasn't that lots of people are too? :) TIME; is the keyword.

But still, looking at so many people that's in love, in a relationship, makes me happy too. I don't know. Sharing their happiness wasn't wrong, right? I kinda get excited reading all those mushy statuses on my facebook's feed. Haha. 

Right now, the thing that I wants to do is to become the better me. Without losing the real me. As lots of people tells me, I'm egoist, I'm selfish bastards, I'm childish, I'm immature, and so on. I guess I'm a human as I am. Lots of time, I think I had never change much. And it gives me a feeling that I can't interpret into words when someone said to me that I'm no longer the person that had been known before. I don't know. Am I the one that changing, or that person had never sees the real me? I don't have the answer at all. Still, life needs to go on. :)

For some reason, I remembering someone that I meet when I was twelve years old. I really don't know why. He keep on lingering in my mind, no matter how hard I tried to keep him away. I still wishing him the best, though. Even I don't know much of him right now, but apart of me believe that he'll change, because deep inside him, I believe, he's a good person. Someone said I'm stupid for believing and hoping too high of him. But I keep on doing it. Because always looking at the bad side of people is tiring. That's why I'm trying my best living and looking at only good side of people. Despite failing to do so, lots of time. XD

Off-topic: I just updated my post editor. Haha. I just realized that I could do so, and now, posting things will be easier, as it seems neater than the older version. :) Oh, and I don't think I'll be able to upload pictures anymore. I don't know. Feeling people reading, knowing, and looking at me is kinda creepy.

Anyway~ take care, and have a great day, everyone~~~

~*~NaBiLaH~*~

(|}^.^{|)~♪♫ ayaka - Blue Days

you might not know it, but i freaking miss you.