Something about: walking down memory lane.

I was reading this from a friend's blog. So I thought I want to do the same? 2010 will come to an end, soon than I expected. This year had mean a lot to me, as I see, learn and experiencing many things that I never thought I would. I mean, not that soon. XD This year, again, had seen me cries and laugh, making new friends, and learn to open a little bit of my heart. It comes with consequences, and I didn't regret it, not even a little. Because without such experience, I'll not be the me as I am, and not being mature, even a little that I was before.

Things I have done:

1. Entering a university. Even the course was not the course that I really hope, but I thankful that I at least could continue studying. I can't complain much after all, my result aren't that good to be compared as many others, so given the chance to continue studying was enough to me.

2. Making new friends. Despite things was not going on as well as I hope at first, but I'm grateful that I know them. In the end, I could makes conclusion that no living human is perfect. We makes mistakes. We yell, we get angry, we share secrets, we share feelings, we share thoughts, we laugh, we cry, we, learn, and do many more together, and I think having wonderful memories is all that I need. I guess I'm not in a position to asks for more. 

3. Catching up with my old good friends. Friends from during my standard school, especially. Its fun to know that lots of them is growing up, become mature, and even be in relationship. Haha~ XD Who would've thought that my friends from two completely different school and not knowing each other had met and well, being couple? Its kinda awkward when I learn about it at first, but after awhile, I can see them together. I really hope that they'll get married one day. They look so cute together! I too, learned about a friend that had changed her way of looking at me. Before, I was a very kampung type of girl, didn't really socialize much with girls, and not that clever to be compared to many others, and just yesterday she says that "if I can turn back the time, I think I'll change many things that happened between us" and all. It kinda shocking to me, but I could only said that people change. I did, and so did she.

4. Learning traditional dance. Not that much, but still. Haha~ Me+dancing is not a good equation. Definitely. And listening to a senior commenting that I more like marching than dancing is not that encouraging, too. I can't dance, because I can't follow the beat perfectly. Tone-deaf, I believe. Haha~ But still, its an experience, and the most important thing is I enjoy what I did. 

5. Learn to live without my parents beside me. Waking up in the morning, especially. Because I'm a heavy sleepers. Who could've thought that the person that need her mother to (literally) screams that her ear could wake up by herself? And even taking care of her roommates, too? Haha. I (literally) was the alarm clock in my room. There are times when I didn't have an early class and well, having my monthly period, so I didn't wake up that early. Guess what happen? Both of my roommates almost late to go to their classes. Haha. XD

6. Do confessions. No. Not in my blog. But to people that I love and I care and everyone that I appreciate in my life. Not one. But everyone that I really care. But to think back, I did confess to him, too. 

7. Learn to walk properly. Haha. This. People keep on complaining to me how I actually walk like a gangster and whatsoever, and the conclusion that could be made was; I need high heels. Or I'll be walking like a duck. HAHAHAAAAAA. I can't wear flats. For real. And just yesterday my best friend advising me that its not good and blablabla. But no, high heels is my lifesaver. XD

8. Wears  baju kebaya. For dinner. I can't believe that I did that, actually. Because I used to be fat before, and wearing baju kabaya was just a no-no to me. But yeah, the good thing about Arau is I'm losing weight, easily. Even my friends says that I look smaller than before. One of my aunts says that my face really look smaller. I never care much about my weight. But after losing many, I look back at my old pictures and sighs. I am fat before. Not fat fat, but chubby type of fat. XD

9. Losing weight. Lots of it, I believe? XD With walking around the campus by foot and those co-curricular activity, I think I lose quite a lot. Maybe around four-five kg? To some people, its not that much, but for someone short like me, losing those few kilos could affect a lot in BMI. Hehe~ I think being short is not that bad. Some guys think short people is cute. XD

I won't be doing the list of things that I had not manage to do. I don't know. I think if I did it, I might end up crying right here right now. I don't want that to happen. And sometime, saying "thank you" is even sadder than saying "goodbye". But still, people refuse to bid farewell. Why?

Its already New Year's eve, and tomorrow the journey to Arau will begin. *sigh*

Anyway, take care and have a great New Year, everyone!!!

(|]^.^[|)♪♫~~~ Ne-Yo - So Sick

Something about: Prince Charming.

Prince Charming. The image that I have about Prince Charming all these while is someone who's tall, dark, and handsome.

Tall.

Dark.

Handsome.

The three combination that is so hard to be found nowadays. Believe me. Because I had never found (yet) someone with all these three combination. Haha.

I had met someone who's tall and dark. Handsome? NO.

Next, I had met someone Who's dark and handsome. But he's short. Really. He's in the same class with me last semester. But I'm not so sure for this upcoming semester.

I had also met someone who's handsome and tall. But he's so fair, much fairer than me. Urgh. I'm damn jealous of him, okay? My skin had been darker after I become a university student. Haha. Marching practices and all.

The chances of meeting a Prince Carming is like, one in a billion. Billion I tell you! BILLION! 

Apa yang aku merepek sebenarnya ni? >.>"

ps: MALAYSIA WON? *happy* CONGRATULATION HARIMAU MALAYA!

Anyway, have a great day, and take care!

(|]^.^[|) ~~  Jordin Sparks - Tattoo

Something about: despite feeling down,...

...there's something that makes me happy. Look What I have!

OMG OMG OMG!!!

Me smiling happily with Sidney Sheldon's "Rage of Angels". ^^

Don't asks me the price. I almost got a heart attack. But its definitely definitely worth it. Because its SIDNEY SHELDON!!! *excited* One of my favourite writers, ever! ^^v I had read a few of his books, and all these while, I love "Master of the Game" the most. I think I finished reading that book within just a couple of days because I was too excited to know what happen next. Haha. ^^v

About yesterdays' shopping. Other than the book, I buy a pair of shoes. High heels. But it barely reach an inch. Haha. Its kinda cool, to me. Maroon-ish. From Santa footwear. No picture because my Olympus decided to annoyed me at the moment. -,-" I was thinking about getting a wedges, but I think that could wait. ^^v

Yesterday too, I'm trying to find a hijab, the kind that I always wear. But its getting harder. Nowadays, people didn't really wears it anymore. People likes to wear the fashionable types, like shawl and ready-to-wear type of hijab. I didn't like any of it. Haihh~ *sigh* Its because I didn't like to styling my hijab. I don't know. I just didn't like it. I would and I could, but it just, I feel I'm not being myself. There are times when I need to, so I'll change it, but it doesn't mean that I like it. Haha. But seriously, where can I find the normal hijab nowadays? Even my mother and my sister starts to complain, because they didn't really like this situation, too. Haish~~~ Help? :)

Oh oh, I just remember this. I followed my father to a few banks to withdraw and deposit some money. A EON Bank, there's this guy who's looking at me from top-to-toe and managed to freaked me out. Seriously, I don't know what's wrong with him. The only thing that I want to do that time is just hiding behind my father. Creepy guy is creepy, I tell you! He's like, checking me out! I didn't like it at all. OMG OMG. I'm so scared. :/ Luckily, the customers aren't that many. My father settling thing and we get out from that bank.

Yesterday is definitely tiring. Haha. I guess that's the only conclusion could be made. 

Anyway, take care and have a great day everyone~~~ ^^v

(|]^.^[|)♪♫~ Katy Perry - I Kissed a Girl

Something about: I'm feeling down, down, down~~~

I feel bad. Lately, I had been so much into me that I'd forgotten about other had their own problem too. To be honest, my own problem isn’t THAT big to be compared to many others.

Everyone that lives in this world had their own problem. The differences between each and every single one of us is what the problem is, and the way we solved and managing the problem itself.

Some people hide and pretending that the problem isn't exist.
Some people were so agitated to solve it so that they could live their life peacefully, and just move on.
Some people like to delay things, taking time to solve it because they tend to think that it won't get worse. Need not to panic. Panic solves nothing.

I really feel bad to myself when I learn about a problem of one of my friends. Comparing his problem and mine, seriously, his problem is way bigger than mine. I’m sorry, my dear friend. Sorry for being selfish to you. Sorry for not try to understand sooner. I’m so, so sorry.

I guess I’m being emo right now. Sorry. TT_TT



(|]=,=[|) Jesse McCartney - Told You so

Something about: If I don't know what love is...

Something is soooo wrong with me. Haha. I just finished reading 60-something words pages of something, and I cried. A LOT. I don't know why. Things suddenly hits me so much that I can't control myself. Since I become a teen, I rarely broke like that. Crying so much that my eyes swollen (for real this time. I just hope that my parents won't realized it) for things that happened in the past. It just so weird that it hits me now because it had happened loonnngggg ago. I was reading as I listening to Kerispatih's songs, and it just hits me so much that I lost control and cries. Hohoho~ I know I'm weird. But I can't helped it.

I remember once upon a time, talking with the girls and the topic about regrets and turn back the time appear. The details should be kept as secrets, but one thing for sure, my opinion didn't change since before. Even I could turn back time, would I take it and make changes, the answer then (and now) is no. Why? I don't even know. It just feel so wrong.

A few days back, I got a text from someone. Just one sentence, and it did break my heart a little. "Did you live your life just fine?" Yet I can't gather enough courage to answer it. I could only delete the text and keep telling myself that its time to let go. I think that it might be a mistake to do such thing, but even I could turn back time, I won't change my decision. What's done is done. And I believe that its for the best. Since I'm not the one that making absolute decision that time. That person did. I thought that I should just keep on walking. And I think I did. So why bother trying so hard when you know things won't get better, anyway? Why trying to cherish and care when you'll leave in the end?

Damn! I'm, so emotional right now. What's wrong with me? Where's the narcissist Nabilah and the ignorant Nabilah? Where are you when I need you? :/ I think I need someone to bear-hug me and tells me that things will get better eventually. I think I hate apart of me that believes that everyone will live their life happily ever after. The childish and the naive part of me. I hate it so much right now.

People changing. Sometimes for the better. Sometime it didn't goes that way. But its a process that won't come to an end. Never. Ever.

Sometimes, I don't know if what had I done is a mistake. I just need people to tell me about it kindly, and maybe scold me when I'm too stubborn, and give me times to think about it. I think I'm not that complex, right?

Anyway, take care and have a great day everyoneee~~~

(|]-,-[|) Tangga - Cinta Begini

Something about: trust issue.

Okay. I just want to rambling about things that bugging my mind right now. Especially after I read one of the post from someone who's very dear to me. One of it is trust issue. We, as living creatures, I believe had our own complexity(-ies). It varies from one person to another. The complexity itself, and the way we handle it.

Back to trust issue. This is one of many complexities that I have. I find it hard to believe (people) other than myself. I guess after many things had happened to me, believing and trusting other is not an easy task for me. It didn't feels better too as I recently tried to trust others, and betrayed in the end. I don't know. Maybe I'm the one that misunderstood everything, but everything feels so wrong for me. That's why I'm deciding that trusting myself is the best thing that I could do to myself. Heee~ =)

I did not have any complexity over my body. People could say anything about my figure, but did I care that much? NO. Haha. But I have complexity over my health condition. I'm not the healthiest girl, but I'm trying to not be the sickest girl alive. That I promise you. =) I didn't like it when there's thing(s) disturbing my mind, and thinking that a little nap could do some help, but end up having bad dream(s). And I think I didn't have enough contact with sun. Staying inside my house and didn't go out for weeks (literally) did give out effects to me. Heeee~ And and and, I get dizzy easily, too. When I sit for a little while and stand again, sometimes I can't control my body. Feeling dizzy and almost lost my consciousness. Why oh whyyy? :/ I didn't like it at all.

Next. I think I'm worried over nothing. I don't know...... I feels like whining, but I don't know who could stand listening to it. Haha~ XD

I just finished watching 8TV Nite Live show (as I'm drafting this), the last episode ever with Mike and Jules and I cried. ;___; I wish the best for their future. Its hard as I had been watching it since like, FOREVER. I miss watching Moe and Mike together, because the first memories of me and that show was like, Mike and Moe trying their best to not jumble up their words and overlapping each other before they start to get involved with K-Pop and so on. And there's Mike and Baki together and gaining their cute petname, Maki. And then there's also Jules, the only roses among the thorns (LOL. seriously). A very fun woman. Owh. For the first time ever, they all were on the show at the same time with their three possible new hosts, making seven of them there. Haha. Its so messed up and so fun. I can't decide between the three of them, which one is better. But I think the guy was quite interesting. He kinda look like Mike a little. Haha. XD

Anyway, take care and have a great day, everyone~~~

(|]=,=[|)♪♫~ Kerispatih - Lagu Rindu

Something about: Its time. :)

Yesterday, I had done one thing. One step. That I pray so much that I won't regret it later. A part of me is proud of myself, because this step is so hard to be done, that it takes lots of my courage to do it. Because makes such decision means that I'm giving myself another chance. Of what? I guess its better if I keep it as a secret. ;) I guess I'm not ready yet to announce the real thing. As I'm trying my best to survive here, after all.

Anyway, yesterday my uncle, my aunt and my cousin pay us a visit. Because I was asleep, still, at that time, my cousin had woke me up. And he manage to do so. Haha. A day in history. XD really, I'm a heavy sleepers, so to wake me up really takes courage. Lots of it. Truthfully, I do miss him so much. As we both grow up, less and more less time that me could spend with each other. Plus, there's going to be months before his departure to another country miles away from Malaysia to further his study. I'm not entirely sure, but yeah, he'll go around next year, Insya-ALLAH. I really hope that he will, as this is his ambition.

But we didn't get to talk much. =( This is because we kinda listen to our parents that talks about marriage and something along that. How the topic even started, eh? Was it because of my brother? Or was it because of many wedding invitation since the school holiday? :/ But for sure, the parents talks a lot about it. Haha. We both just sit there. And listen. And laugh. =)

I miss those time when we, along with other cousins that around our age will stay up until late at night and talks. And talks. About everything that we could. I miss when the boundaries between girls and boys aren't that thick that we could talk almost EVERYTHING. And I'll be the only girl with my other boy's cousin will watch WWE (because our kampung have astro, in case you forgotten) until almost dawn. Just because we want to. Or talking and listen about ghost stories. Damn! I miss those moment so, so much! :'(

Talking about this just makes me remember about one thing that happen during Raya morning. After seeks forgiveness with each other, it had been kinda a tradition to taking pictures. (yeah, camwhoring time. ^^) And one of my cousin (guy) was only wearing his baju melayu with kain pelikat. And we kindly asks him to change into the pants and wears sampin. When we're taking the pictures of him with his family members, he stands behind the chair. So that he wear underneath couldn't be seen, and he's kinda casually-whining about what's the purpose of him changing if we could only takes pictures of upper part of him. And every single one of us, cousins, and uncles, and aunts laugh so much of it. This is why I love raya so much. We could all gather together and just be ourself.

Its kinda saddening as my brother and my sister is married and they need to juggling the years to spend at where at what year. :/ And then, all of us, cousins, is scattering around Malaysia, studying here and there. Plus this particular cousin that'll furthering his studies overseas. Raya nowadays feels different than last few years.

But still, knowing each other is doing our best is good. Its better than nothing. ;)

Oh, about soccer. Malaysia wins over Indonesia, 3-0. I'm happy for them. Congratulation Malaysia team!!!

And few days back, my father had been nagging about smoking and smoker, AGAIN. Something happened, and my father was upset as he thought its just rude to smoke in front of person that's eating. Women, especially. Because it happen in front of my mother and I. I understand why he felt so, but I guess tobacco wins over manner, sometimes. :/

Anyway, take care and have a great day everyone~~~

(|]^.^[|)♪♫~ Blue - Sorry Seems to be the Hardest Word

Something about: Reputation.

"Reputation builds on trust that takes time,

but one mistake could crush it into a pile of dust."

That is the thing that I would like to quote for today. For something that I learned today.

My mother, my sister, and I had been getting our baju kurung done by the same tailor for years. If I'm  not mistaken, it had reach 5 years. We had never get any problem with her. But for the first time ever, a few days ago, my sister's few pairs of baju kurung was not sewn properly. And it just feels and looks wrong in every angle. So my mother decided to give a call to the said tailor. But my mother fails to reach her.

Until yesterday's morning, the said tailor calls my mother. And the tailor giving reasons of why those baju kurung end up like that. After minutes talking, my mother ended the conversation. I could listen my mother grumbles in dissatisfaction, "next time, we won't send it to her ever again."

My mother says that actually, it happens because she keep on changing the workers. Little (or maybe none?) did stays with her after years. Its hard to work in the shop, because the need to make everyone satisfied with the clothes, and they're quite popular. They even close the booking for Raya months before fasting months, even, because they had too many costumers.

Truthfully, it wasn't because those baju kurung that my mother was upset about, but the facts that she give excuses over her works.

Managing business is not easy as it look like. One mistake could make things go so wrong that patching things up may be impossible.

So I guess, that's it?


Anyway, take care and have a great day everyone~~~ =)



(|]^.^[|) ♪♫   Monoloque&Atilia - Kekanda Adinda.

Something about: my hometown.

...and reasons of why I'm loving it so much. Here I am, in a very peaceful and great morning, blogging from my own kampung. They can say whatever they want about their own kampung, but I love mine so very much. I like the peacefulness here. The chicken(s) that could barely found anywhere else living freely and bla bla bla. So I guess I just want to listing things out here.

1. My kampung had wireless connection. Cool? =) Very much! And and and, the speed was like, WOAH!!! Hehe~ For someone who's internet is like drug, this is the best thing that could ever happen.

2. My kampung had a very own astro. You didn't read it wrongly. ASTRO. Even my own house didn't have one! I love kampung! ;)

3. The peacefulness here. Ah~ Wake up in the morning and just looking outside, breath and just, AAHHHH~ Its not as polluted as Klang and Kuala Selangor. =)

4. Family. =) It just great that spending time, bonding with each others, catching up with each others life and many more. This is the best. Meeting family members is one of the thing that I love. Because as I grow up, one thing that I realized is we had less and more less time to spend with each other. :/ I miss when once upon a time, we could talk and talk and talk until morning come, and sleep the day away. Haha. Really, I miss those moment so much. Especially Raya Eve. I guess, growing up had it own bad side too. Hehehe~

5. Hamsterssssss. I like them. =) But to keep it by myself? Nuh-uh. Impossible. I could barely taking care of my own self, what more taking care of hamsters. But here, I could spend time with them, without need to worry much about them. And yeah, I just realized earlier that there's nine baby hamsters. NINEEEEE..... *.* Woah! And they're still pinkish and no more fur yest, so I kinda freak out to touch them. So, NO. I WILL NOT touch them. Eeepp! XD

Anyway, take care and have a great day, everyone~~~

(|]^.^[|)♪♫  API - Pelita.

Something about: confession(s).

14. I'm NOT a gay. But I like to act like one. I don't know. Making guys afraid of me was kinda cool, you know? But no, I'm not a lesbian and whatsoever. =,= It just weird when someone asks me directly if I'm a lesbian. Haha. I don't like real lesbian. They're creepy. Giving me goosebumps all over myself. But I like to pretend to be one. Its fun.

15. I love myself so much. That is a fact, well-known by people around me. But I guess loving myself so much that I barely could love others was not a popular fact of me. So there. :)

16. I have a hot over Kamenashi Kazuya. Talk good thing or nothing about him, and you'll be safe. One bad word about him, well. ^^v You should prepare yourself. I'm biased as that. =)

Anyway, take care and have a great day everyone~

(|]^.^[|)♪♫~ Crystal Kay - Boyfriend ~What Makes me Fall in Love~

Something about: We need to know.

Sometimes we thought we are the one hurting.

That we didn't realized that we are hurting others, too. 

(|]=,=[|) ♪♫ - Kerispatih - Lagu Rindu

Something about: I miss you.

I guess that's why the only images about you that playing in my mind is you blushing till the tips of your ears upon seeing my bright smile.


And the fact that I meet someone years after that, that having so many things in common with you didn't really help me healing faster, too. :/




(|]=,=[|) ♪♫ Utada Hikaru - First Love

Something about: confusion(s).

Because there are time(s) when you can't decide whether to cry or laugh. 

Anyway, take care and have a great day everyone~~~




(|]=,=[|)♪♫~ flumpool - Over the Rain ~Hikari no Hashi~

Something about: confession(s).

So I decided to make series out of this. Have fun~

11. I talks with Miss F today. For almost an hour. It somehow makes me feel extremely great to know that she's living her life so well. I miss you so, so much. And kame-chan still sleeps with me. Though I don't know if kame-chan will follow me this upcoming semester. Hee~

12. I can't understand my father sometimes. A few days ago, he talked (complained) to me about smoking and smoker. I understand that he hates them. Okay. Despise them is more likely. But then, my brother is not a smoker. So is my brother-in-law. The thing is, why he complained to me? >.>" I can't understand it.

13. I should so friends cleaning on my facebook. NOT adding more and more people into it. Hehe~ XD I still failed to do so. Seeing the numbers growing makes me lazy to do it. I mean. I'm having 260-something "friends" on my facebook, and I barely interacted with almost half of them. 60-something was just friends that I add for the sake of playing Sorority Life (which I had stopped playing it right now, just for the record) and then there's people that I don't even know. But what did I do right now? Trying to find more and more friends from my childhood using it. FAIL!

I just realized that it'll be less than two months and I'll be 19. Uhm. 20 is coming closer. >.>"

Anyway, take care and have a great day, everyone~~~

(|]^.^[|)♪♫ Akanishi Jin - A Page

Something about: just because...

I'm the girl that will running here and there wearing two and half inches high heels.

Resulting blisters all over my legs.

Life is great. ;)

Something about: confession(s).

I just thought that it will be fun to write these out. Haha. ;)

1. I gain weight. Maybe few kilos, maybe more, I don't know. But for sure, my face did looks bigger. The cause - happiness or sadness? I don't know. XD

2. Having two confession throw directly at my faces from two different guys. One that I had blocked from viewing my fb's wall, and another that,... Well. A secret that should kept untold. Haha. It makes something flutters inside, happy indeed, to know that you have people that likes you. But the aftermath is quite suffocating, especially when there's people who can't take a "no" as an answer. I hate being forced. Thus it makes me take such decision, block him from viewing my fb's wall. Its hard for me too, but its too suffocating. Too many things happen to me lately that I'm not being myself anymore. And there's some other guys hinting for relationship too. The only thing that I could do is ignoring them. Posting mushy stuff on my wall like I'm in love (when I actually NOT) and they get the hint and keep things cool. I like that. Keeping relationship as friends right now is very much appreciated by me. 

3. Meeting good old friend(s) in facebook. I call it as "the magic of technology". =) It feels great, very, to know each and every single one of them living their live in their own way. I can't explain it, but it makes me happy. So very much. It even makes me wonders how this person knows this person and that person knows that person, too. The schoolmates from standard school, especially. Most of them, I had lost contact for almost five years, and wallaahhh~ Facebook is there. "The magic of technology". =)

4. Trying to blogging more than I did last year. Heee~ That's why I'm spamming my very own blog. Just to achieve that much. I think I did. =)

5. I miss Arau, damn much. I can't believe I actually say (write) it, but really. I grow fond of that place. I like the peacefulness there. A very great place to focus on your study than others. ;)

6. Had been losing weight more than  thought I did. When I'm in Arau, I never thought that I did lose weight THAT much. Well, until I back home an try to put on some of my old baju kurung that could barely fit on my body before. Hehee~ It makes me happy. But I think I should keep my weight constant. Maybe losing a little bit more, but not so much. I don't want to be just bones and skins. :/

6. Being a stalker that manage to get someone scared of me, a little (LOT). Haha. Sorry Miss F, but stalking you is just a fun thing to do. Until it get bored after a little while. XD So yeah, I didn't stalk her anymore.

7. I miss him. Okay? It had been years, and the things that I heard about him didn't makes me feel good. He manage to make me thinks about "what-if's" and I hate that. So very much.

8. Worrying about someone who I don't even know how things were between us. Confusing, I guess that's the only word that I could use to interpret my feeling about it. Hehe. But its okay. I believe that things will sort out. Eventually. I just need to get myself calm and wait until the right moment. Just go with the flow. 

9. Putting on facade. When things didn't really goes well as planned or as I hoped. I'll just put a smile on my face and pretend that nothing goes wrong. Despite my heart twitch in pain. I guess I just can't say that I'm having a problem to random people? And I guess, little could realized it. A good actress, perhaps? Haha. 

10. Being crazy with my (guy) best friend. A good guy, and someone who's tolerating my crazy acts and sayings. A guy who talks to me about my ego. A guy that'll laugh with my over my silliness. A guy that won't hesitate to tell me if I did mistakes. But definitely not a guy I wanna married with. XD I hope that we will be best friends as long as we live. 

That's it, I guess? ;)

Anyway, take care and have a great day, everyone~

(|]^.^[|) Hilary Duff - So Yesterday.

Something about: Yesterday,...

is a very, very tiring day. Go out from the house since 7:45am, and get inside the house around 5:00pm. Maybe later than that. I was too tired to even look at the clock properly yesterday. Haha.

First, go to District Officer's [D.O.] office, here in Kuala Selangor. The service there was quite, uhm, I believe that could do more, actually, but well. Since the D.O. aren't there, I only managed to get that A.D.O.'s signature in my loan's agreement. When we get to the second floor to do something with the HASIL's stamp, the people who did it was late. The time of the counter should opened was 8.30am, as stated there, but we need to wait for almost ten minutes before the person come. =,=" I guess lots of people were right when they complaint about government's service. Or maybe that day was his unlucky day. Haha.

Next, we went to UiTM Shah Alam. Whewww~ that campus was HUGE, I tell you. We LOST. Hahahahaaaaa~ Manage to find the office after asking lots of people, to get the affirmation that I never get loan or scholarship from anyone and blablabla~ There's something funny happened here. We need to get the exact date of when I will finish studying to fill in the agreement, and they kinda give me "December 2012". Haha. I'm trying my best to NOT snickering, because, well... They should give me something in "July 2013", but THAT? OMG. I don't know if the system was up into something OR hoping that I'll finish studying earlier OR what, but its soooooo funny to me. This just make me remember when I'm 12, making MyKad, and the officer asks me if I really, REALLY born in '92 because the system says that I was born in '93. I guess the systems hates me so much, that's why they keep on giving me problems. Haha. ;___; But then, a good thing happen. There's someone come selling Cadbury's chocolate! My mother buys two bars, that cost RM10. Cheap, no? I'm smiling happilyyyyy~

Only then my mother realized that I left one document at home. But still, we went to S.U.K., Shah Alam to asks if they could accepts it. They did, but they asks us to fax AND post the said document that I had accidentally left behind.

Since there's time, still, we go to Bank Islam Klang to get another copy of my bank numbers. Heee~ that was the document that I accidentally left behind.

After that, we went to MGS. I didn't feel like writing much, but MGS will be in new colour this upcoming school season. Though the colour to me was quite, uhm, too peach-y, but hey, its much better than the last time I sees it. :) I makes me happy to know that they're trying to makes it looks better.

After lunch at some restaurants, we went to my sister's house in Klang for Zuhur prayer. And she gets one of the Cadbury bar. Oh~~~ :/

Going back to S.U.K. Shah Alam to send the said document. Hehe.

My mother than asks when we want to buy the things for my upcoming semester. Okay mom, let's go to Tesco Kuala Selangor! ;) It should be buying my things, but ended up as grocery shopping. Haha. My mother's things is much more than my things. Well, since there's only little things that I need to buy here. I think the other things could wait until I reach Arau. :)

Because Tesco did not have any BELTS (its soooo weird, why don't they sell it there? I just don't understand it. XD) we went to another supermarket just to buy me a new belts. Okay, I know I'm not skinny at all, but every time I buy belts, I need to alters it, over and over again just so that it could fix my waist. XD This new belts too, I think I need to cut it around three more inches so that I could reach the first hole. I hate you, belts! :P

Lastly, home sweet home. :)

Yesterday was tiring that I could just think of my bed and pillow and kame-chan. :) But hey, at least it'll make my parents happier of need not to think so much of money. 

This is my kame-chan. A birthday present from one of my best friend when I was sixteen. :) He's so handsome, no? 

Anyway, have a take care and have a great day, everyone~~~

(|]^.^[|)♪♫ Mr Children - Hanabi. 

Something about: the Sky of Love.

I'm here to share a song from a movie that had managed to makes me cry a river. Okay, that's definitely a lie. XD But really, this movie had touched my heart and leave quite a big impact on me, on the way of me looking how this world works.

This life is not a Disney's fairytale, that ended up "and they live, happily ever after..." of somehow along that line. Or a Barbie's movies. With pretty & handsome dolls along the way. This life means more. But what I like about Disney's and Barbie is they're showing that this life is full of hope. ;)

Okay. About the song. I just stumbled upon a part of the song that roughly translated as "when saying 'thank you' is even sadder than saying 'goodbye'". Its kinda true, sometime. I remember when we had some celebration before SPM, which I cried when saying "thank you"s to some teachers that had teaches me before. It makes me think about things that I had gone through with them, but not because of the need of saying "goodbye", but the realization that hit me upon the word "thank you" itself. Its kinda hard to explain, but I believe that it occurs once in awhile to each and every single one of us.

Why this song? - Because I love the way they put words into it. I'm a tone-deaf or so I believe, I didn't know much of appreciating good music, but I do appreciate great lyrics. Not because of the singer (no, I'm a biased of Toda Erika and will stay that way, plus I hate Aragaki Yui. She irks me without any reason.) And because of the movie, too. This movie does makes me thinks a lot. Minus the fact that Miura Haruma is a hottie, too. XD So yeah, go on and listen to this! ;)

Anyway, take care and have a good day, everyone~~~

(|]^.^[|) Aragaki Yui - Heavenly Days

Something about: sexist!

sexist: 

[adjective]

unfair towards one of the sexes.

But truthfully, in what condition could someone categorized as sexist? Hm... THAT is definitely not an easy thing to tell, no? I didn't hate sexist, but I think that it is just unfair to judge others based on their gender.


Its not about the gender;
its about the person.


That was the thing that I keep on repeating. I had meet many types of people in this world. Of course, bad boys are just one example. But that never means that each and every single male that alive right now is bad, right? I have a father. I have a brother. But they are great people.


The same thing goes to girls too. I believe that many guys had met unworthy types of girls. But does each and every single girls living in this world is the same? Does the same goes to their mother and sister(s) too? For many reasons, I do believe that the answer is no. ;)


I might be a geek, a nerd, someone who didn't socialized much, but I do have my own story. The differentiation between me and the others is the plot of my story. ;)
Nabilah Mohamad Arifin♥ 






Anyway, take care and have a good day, everyone~~~

(|]^.^[|) ♪♫ Ferhad - Pernah

Something about: embracing the feeling(s).

In any type of relationship, we should always avoid ourself from forcing the other party to move our way, that's my opinion. Toleration, I believe, is the key for any type of relationship to be successful.

Given this situation: you're outing with your fellow friends. And its almost lunch time. And one of you asking, "we need to go where?"

"Mamak!" "McD!" "KFC!"

There: the trigger of the dilemma. Haha. =,=" And you will be unnerved, especially when there's a few people with strong personality that presents there, at the same time. You will, right?

Some people will end it with fun ways, like playing scissors-paper-stone to solved it. It is fun, right?

"YEAH!!! McD!!!!!!" Someone screams.

But then, will everyone satisfied with the result(s)?

Tolerating; is easier said than done, especially for someone as hard-headed and egoistic as I am. I'm someone who's sticking to my decision(s) and loves to do things at my pace. I don't know, but being the youngest in family might be one of the reason(s). I guess I kinda spoiled a little bit too much by my family! Its not their fault, but the age gap between me and my siblings was quite huge. It almost like I'm born in complete different era from them, making it quite hard for all of us to not making the gap grows bigger than it already is.

I still am me, myself, trying, learning to become a better person, though. Teach me? *wink*

It took me awhile to realized that the post had nothing to do with the title. Haha. =,="

Anyway~ take care and have a great day, everyone~~~

(|]^.^[|)♪♫ - Danity Kane - Damaged

Sesuatu tentang: perihal daging landak.

Aku sedang melayari internet ketika abahku kembali dari masjid petang tadi. Barulah terkocoh-kocoh aku hendak bersiap untuk melaksanakan solat Asar. Abahku datang kepadaku, membawa satu bekas kecil, sedang aku ingin ke kamar mandi.

"Ada orang bagi daging landak ni." Dengan sedikit teruja, abahku berkata kepadaku.

Aku diam dan senyum, menunjukkan barisan gigiku yang lurus. "Mana abah dapat?" Tanyaku, juga teruja melihat bekas kecil itu.

"Tadi, dekat masjid, ada orang bagi. Bukan landak yang diternak, tapi diburu dari hutan katanya." Abahku menjawab sambil meletakkan bekas di atas meja.

Tidak berkata apa-apa lagi, aku menuju ke kamar mandi untuk mengangkat wudhu' untuk menyempurnakan solat Asarku.

Emakku yang baru kemudian terus menuju kamar tidurku. "Adik, siapa yang bagi daging tu?" Emak bertanya, merujuk kepada bekas kecil yang berada di atas meja.

Abahku di kamar tidurnya ketika itu.

"Abah kata ada orang bagi abah di masjid, Asar tadi." Aku menjawab, sebelum menyambung, "Daging landak. Mak, adik tak makan. Tak berani. Hee~"

Emak mengangguk lalu meninggalkan aku dengan dunia maya ku.

Tengah malam tadi aku tengok, luak sedikit saja daging tu. Kalau siapa-siapa berminat, datanglah rumah~ Haha. :) Aku tak makan pon. Tak ada keberanian. Propa je lebih. Buat karangan macamlah aku dah makan daging landak tu, kan? Hehehee~ =)

(|]^.^[|) - Aizat - Pergi

Something about: Because I can do so.

I choose to believe him. Because he's my best friends, and I believe that he'll never once do something that'll hurt me nor my feelings. Let's just pray that he won't, okay? ;) Tonight, we kinda talks a lot. I'm glad that he's still there, by my side, and tell me when I did mistakes. Scold me, even. It makes you happy to know that there's people that actually cares of you. =)

I don't know what's wrong with me right now. It feels like I'm riding a roller coaster or something. Haha. I'm too confused to put my feelings into words right now. XD I need to take a breather, rest, before continue walking in my life.

Anyway~ take care and have a great day, everyone~~~ 

(|]^.^[|)♪♫ - Nat King Cole - LOVE

Something about: about time.

There's people that'll try their best to hurt you.

There's also people that'll their best to protect you.

There's people that'll be sad when you're feeling down.

There's also people that'll smile when you're laughing your hearts out.

I remember a guy had said, "living this life with the same amount of tears and laughter, that what I want to do". For some reason, it broke my heart a little. "Lots and lots of people will chose smiling and laughing and just - be happy, rather than be sad and cry, so why you choose to live your life like that?" - I want to asks him. But I never get the chance to do so. Life is full of hope, right? That's one of the purpose of living, right? I wonder what will he answer me. Though its almost impossible. But who knows if we'll ever meet, no? Life is full of surprises.

I remember how traumatized I was once upon a time. To know that there's people hurts because of me. Because of naivety. Because I was dumb back then. Because I didn't believe that such thing would happen. Because when I know about it, it had already been to late to do something.

If you think that I'll be happy over someone else's sadness and hurt, you're totally wrong! No matter how bad I am, I can't do something like that. Its just so wrong. Its inhuman. And I still am a human, I still have feelings. But then, everything that I do or I say is just futile to you now, right?

Anyway~ take care, and have a great day, everyone~~~

~*~NaBiLaH~*~

(|]-,-[|)~♪♫ Kertas - Penantianku 

Sesuatu tentang: hukum dunia. =)

Tak bermakna yang tak jahat itu baik.

Dan tak bermakna jugak yang tak baik itu jahat.

Nothings ever black and white.

Please bear that in your mind, yeah? =)

I hate when I'm being forced to do something that I refuse to.

Something about: happiness. :)

A few good things had comes to me. I think I'm much more calm right now, compare to few days back. Few hectics days had almost makes me lose myself. Things comes all too sudden at the same time had really, really makes me depressed, actually.

What would you do when trust come into your vision? One of my best friend asks me, did I trust him? There's few things had happen that I think, did affect our relationship a little. It wasn't that I didn't trust him, but right now, under this circumstances fall upon me, I don't know if its something that I could give to him. Trust is a big word, you know? Too big to be talked about right now.

Up until now, I never know how to act, to say, to do, when someone confess to me. Anyhow, thanks to everyone that liking me. I never good at feelings. *blushing* But I just hope that things will never be awkward in the end. Awkwardness is tiring. Suffocating. It makes me can't breath freely, do things as I wish and much more. I hate that.

Losing my "single" status is NOT my top priority right now. I still have a dream that I'm chasing. But if the right time, right person, and Mr Right had come, why not? I'm not running away, but I guess, opening my heart again is going to takes some time. Afraid to be hurt had making me hid into the shell, again. Yes, I'm a coward. But hey, wasn't that lots of people are too? :) TIME; is the keyword.

But still, looking at so many people that's in love, in a relationship, makes me happy too. I don't know. Sharing their happiness wasn't wrong, right? I kinda get excited reading all those mushy statuses on my facebook's feed. Haha. 

Right now, the thing that I wants to do is to become the better me. Without losing the real me. As lots of people tells me, I'm egoist, I'm selfish bastards, I'm childish, I'm immature, and so on. I guess I'm a human as I am. Lots of time, I think I had never change much. And it gives me a feeling that I can't interpret into words when someone said to me that I'm no longer the person that had been known before. I don't know. Am I the one that changing, or that person had never sees the real me? I don't have the answer at all. Still, life needs to go on. :)

For some reason, I remembering someone that I meet when I was twelve years old. I really don't know why. He keep on lingering in my mind, no matter how hard I tried to keep him away. I still wishing him the best, though. Even I don't know much of him right now, but apart of me believe that he'll change, because deep inside him, I believe, he's a good person. Someone said I'm stupid for believing and hoping too high of him. But I keep on doing it. Because always looking at the bad side of people is tiring. That's why I'm trying my best living and looking at only good side of people. Despite failing to do so, lots of time. XD

Off-topic: I just updated my post editor. Haha. I just realized that I could do so, and now, posting things will be easier, as it seems neater than the older version. :) Oh, and I don't think I'll be able to upload pictures anymore. I don't know. Feeling people reading, knowing, and looking at me is kinda creepy.

Anyway~ take care, and have a great day, everyone~~~

~*~NaBiLaH~*~

(|}^.^{|)~♪♫ ayaka - Blue Days

you might not know it, but i freaking miss you.