Something about: happiness. :)

A few good things had comes to me. I think I'm much more calm right now, compare to few days back. Few hectics days had almost makes me lose myself. Things comes all too sudden at the same time had really, really makes me depressed, actually.

What would you do when trust come into your vision? One of my best friend asks me, did I trust him? There's few things had happen that I think, did affect our relationship a little. It wasn't that I didn't trust him, but right now, under this circumstances fall upon me, I don't know if its something that I could give to him. Trust is a big word, you know? Too big to be talked about right now.

Up until now, I never know how to act, to say, to do, when someone confess to me. Anyhow, thanks to everyone that liking me. I never good at feelings. *blushing* But I just hope that things will never be awkward in the end. Awkwardness is tiring. Suffocating. It makes me can't breath freely, do things as I wish and much more. I hate that.

Losing my "single" status is NOT my top priority right now. I still have a dream that I'm chasing. But if the right time, right person, and Mr Right had come, why not? I'm not running away, but I guess, opening my heart again is going to takes some time. Afraid to be hurt had making me hid into the shell, again. Yes, I'm a coward. But hey, wasn't that lots of people are too? :) TIME; is the keyword.

But still, looking at so many people that's in love, in a relationship, makes me happy too. I don't know. Sharing their happiness wasn't wrong, right? I kinda get excited reading all those mushy statuses on my facebook's feed. Haha. 

Right now, the thing that I wants to do is to become the better me. Without losing the real me. As lots of people tells me, I'm egoist, I'm selfish bastards, I'm childish, I'm immature, and so on. I guess I'm a human as I am. Lots of time, I think I had never change much. And it gives me a feeling that I can't interpret into words when someone said to me that I'm no longer the person that had been known before. I don't know. Am I the one that changing, or that person had never sees the real me? I don't have the answer at all. Still, life needs to go on. :)

For some reason, I remembering someone that I meet when I was twelve years old. I really don't know why. He keep on lingering in my mind, no matter how hard I tried to keep him away. I still wishing him the best, though. Even I don't know much of him right now, but apart of me believe that he'll change, because deep inside him, I believe, he's a good person. Someone said I'm stupid for believing and hoping too high of him. But I keep on doing it. Because always looking at the bad side of people is tiring. That's why I'm trying my best living and looking at only good side of people. Despite failing to do so, lots of time. XD

Off-topic: I just updated my post editor. Haha. I just realized that I could do so, and now, posting things will be easier, as it seems neater than the older version. :) Oh, and I don't think I'll be able to upload pictures anymore. I don't know. Feeling people reading, knowing, and looking at me is kinda creepy.

Anyway~ take care, and have a great day, everyone~~~

~*~NaBiLaH~*~

(|}^.^{|)~♪♫ ayaka - Blue Days

you might not know it, but i freaking miss you.